Tuitions are a bane and not a boon

Tuition System - A BOON or A BANE...!!

There have always been 3 types of students in the Education system –

• The crème genius lot
• The average students
• The weak students

A few decades back “The Tuition System” had altogether a different perspective. It was never a thing to be proud of. Infact, it was the thing to be ashamed of. The crème and the average students always paid attention well in the class and could cope up with the syllabus well. But since for the weak student s it was difficult to cope up with the syllabus by just studying in the school so it was mandatory for them to have extra coaching and thereby they were being sent to private tuitions. The school teachers have always been completing the syllabus in the school from that very time so that all could benefit. But only those who could not cope up with the syllabus required an extra dose of teaching.

However, these days the entire concept of “The Tuition System”has changed. An entire new psyche has developed for this system. It has just become a “Trend” in the fabric of education system.

More than education, The private tuitions are being used as the ‘Status Symbol’. The system has rather lost its track and the actual values and purpose has been lost. This system has become almost madness, a disease. These days every child good, bad or very weak all resort to tuition, in almost every subject. Infact, the heights is that the tuitions are being kept in languages also which is a shameful gesture. English is an International language must be known by the kid. Hindi being the National Language should also be well-taught. And the third one is the mother tongue which each child speaks in his/her own family for which tuitions are in vain. But still just because few other kids of the same class are going, parents send their child too. So it turns outta be never-ending cycle.

Let the subjects be aside, tuitions are being encouraged irrespective of the age. I mean I myself being a school teacher I too had got offers to take tuitions of students studying in Jr. Kg. and Sr. Kg. I mean what the heck are the parents upto?  And what do this kiddos have in their curriculum? Sleeping line, standing line, slanting lines, alphabets and numbers and colors, may be a few words and sentences. For that, you require a tuition. And the parents actually beseeched me and were ready to pay any amount of money for that. Although they were not ashamed of what they were asking for but I myself felt ashamed coz I found it Hogwash.

And what’s the reason behind it??? U ask and they will not take an iota of second to blame it on school teachers that the quality of teachers is not the same any more. Teachers don’t  teach properly and so on.  And all this is utter flimflam.

I being a school teacher know zillions of teachers and have worked with all reputed schools. It’s the fundamental duty or an oath of a teacher to complete the syllabus and teach in such a way that a child develops cognitively and every teacher does it to the core in her way. They are not appointed just in any haphazard way.  Because they have it in them, so they are there.

So its not at all about the teachers. Its either about the kids who are not able to cope up or its about the parents. Fathers have always been working few decades back and even now too and its not gonna change coz that’s what they are meant too. But housewives, they send their kids to tuitions coz they want to sleep in afternoon, they want to attend kitty parties, they want to gossip over phone calls and most importantly they want to see their daily soaps. If “Anandi” (balika vadhu fame) was allowed to study, you could have seen the happiness on these ladies’ faces. But when its about their own kid, tuition teachers will do the needful.  Howeva, there are exceptions of some working women but they are expected to balance their personal and professional life and take interest in the child’s academic progress too. Its highly shameful that a child is being sent to ‘n’ number of tuitions just so that u have ur own leisure time. 

Parents don’t understand that its not we teachers who are at loss, its they and their kids who are at loss. We teachers get our salary in school also and if we do tuitions we are gonna earn from that too. But think about the kids. They get exhausted at the end of the day when they reach home after being thrown from one tuition to another. And think about the abundance of money that u r throwing out impulsively in vain in the form of tuition fees.

The parents are restricting the cognitive development of their kids by encouraging the tuition system since a child becomes used to spoon-feeding.  Moreover, a child’s psychology is – In school thinks, if I don’t pay attention its ok because the tuition teacher will teach it and at tuition , the child thinks school teacher will teach. So ultimately the child gets distracted and doesn’t grasp as per his/her true caliber.

Instead, encourage and inculcate the attentiveness and concentration power in the kids so that they pay sufficient attention in the class itself and grasp every single word of the teacher in the class-room. These days there are various activities n teaching aids used in the smart schools here and there. May it be audio-visual  technique or labeling or smart boards. The child can learn the best if knows how to make use of every resource and pays active attention.

Howeva, I don’t blame only parents or kids. Even for few Non-smart schools or inactive teachers, there is an urgent need to inject life into dull classroom teaching before schools become a grotesque appendage to the educational system. Once this is done, there will be no need for the student to be tutored. If some of them still need it for one reason or the other, there is a huge army of unemployed graduates and post-graduates who can take care of them. This will not only enable the unemployed to earn a living but also supplement what has already been taught in classrooms.

The law has also been defined which says “Private tuition imparted by serving teachers is a serious educational malpractice which deserves outright condemnation by all the right-thinking individuals, most of all by serious academicians”. Hence, being one educator I feel it would be good if the other educators too discourage the tuition systems and infact create a better classroom so that students don’t get diverted to this total “waste-of-time and money” system.

Its lyk U are married to ur husband/wife just for the permanent security else you can go ahead with ‘n’ number of extra-marital affairs.  Is that acceptable in the society?? Same is the case with this too. U are committed to a school just for the certificate and gradecard that u get, else you can go ahead with ‘n’ number of tuitions. Can this be acceptable..

The parents and the teachers should together contribute to discourage the tuition system and actively participate in the Cognitive Development of the kids…!! That’s what I feel.

TUITION SYSTEMS ARE NOT A BOON FOR ME- THEY ARE BANE...!!

Bombay-- Now MUMBAI...!!!

B-O-M-B-A-Y now called "M-U-M-B-A-I"

Few Things About this City That Amazes me...:

Bombay has No Bombs and is a Harbour, Not a Bay.
Churchgate has Neither a Church Nor a Gate. It is a Railway Station.
There is No Darkness in Andheri.
Lalbaag is Neither Red Nor a Garden.
No King ever stayed at Kings Circle.
Nor did Queen Victoria stay at Victoria Terminus.
Nor is there any Princess at Princess Street .
Lower Parel is at the same level as Parel.
There are No marines or Sailors at Marine Lines.
The Mahalaxmi temple  is at Haji Ali, not at Mahalaxmi.
Teen bati is a Junction of 3 Roads, not 3 Lamps.
Trams used to terminate at Kings circle, not Dadar*TramTerminus. (Dadar T.T..).
Breach Candy is not a SweetMeat Market, but there is a Hospital.
There are no Ironsmiths at Lohar chawl.
There are no pot-makers or Potters at Kumbhar wada.
Lokhandwala complex is not an Iron and steel market.
Null bazaar does not sell taps.
You will not find ladyfingers at Bheendi Bazar... 

Yet its MUMBAI - A city of Dreams... Or shall I say - A city of Shattered Dreams..
Or short-term Dreams....!!! 
Where life is sooooo fast... That if U dont Cope up.. U r left behind even by Ur Near n Dear ones...
Where whateva U earn gets spent in that very city...
Where To Build Up Page-3 Reputation is much more important 
While Ur Family Life is Shattering or Either Most of the Time Under Construction...
Where People keep brooding in the Day about their funds and debts
And the same people enjoy the Night-Life to the Fullest...
Where the Sea gives Symapthy to Many Broken Hearts...
And same Sea is the witness of Public Displays of Affection...!!
Where the Rain is Praised at Nariman Point .....
And the same Rain is Cursed in Traffic Jams...!!
Where the Childhood is Spent in Essel-World
And The Adult Age in Hard-Rock Cafe...
The City that is Over-Crowded
But Still None has time for another or bothered about other...!!!
The City Where Celebrities Reside... Settle  
The City of Glamsham,,,, Where the Stars Sparkle
And the same City leaves them with a void and Darkness during their Downfall....
The City Where People Enter to Earn Name and Fame...
And after Few Decades Even their Words Sound Lame...!!
The City that is responsible for Economic Growth of the Country...
But just once visit -Dharavi and you will unfold your own myth.....
Still at the end of the Day -- Its AAMCHI MUMBAI...!!!
A city of Pride n Pleasure...!!!

Jay Hind...!! Jay Maharashtra....!!!! 

With a Cup of Starbucks Coffee ...Looking at the Sea-Face....
I still Remember a Song of Late. Rafi....
"Aye Dil Hai Mushkil Jeena Yahaan.....
Zara Hat ke... Zara Bachke ...
Yeh hai Mumbai Meri Jaaaan...!!! "

P.S.- No offense Meant...

My Mentor - A Best Friend, Philosopher, Guide

My Mentor- My Mummaa (That’s what I call her)….Is My Blessed Gift..!! ☺☺☺

There are many people who have inspired me in many ways. But, My Mentor, however, inspired me the most. This lady that I am talking about is a very hardworking, truthful and a caring person. Besides that, she is extraordinary perfectionist. I am very blissful to be a part of her life and I am overjoyed that she is a part of mine too. I would absolutely idolize her as my role model who has a very strong willpower. ☺☺

As we all know, a good mentor is every child’s gift and each and every one of us deserves one. No one’s life is ever complete without a mentor somewhere throughout their life. In addition to that, I am extremely blessed to have her in mine and I also feel very lucky to have her helping me and supporting me with my career and life.

Furthermore, whenever I look at her, I love her with all of my heart and I would never abolish my relationship with her. It is very hard for me to express my feelings about her just in words because there is so much to say that’s hard to explain. As long as I understand, I feel overjoyed. Satisfaction never runs out in my life while my mentor is still here with me... ☺☺

A dreamer, an ardent leader, for no two days the same, Who is she? Just imagine it's more than a name.
She's a pleasure, a treasure, a comfort each day, Loving and sweet in her own special way.
She's a sense of contentment felt deep inside, Bringing a lifetime of pleasure and pride!
And she came as a pioneer and a bit later became a trendsetter.
The love she showers is like a spring that never stops flowing.
From which you can draw water, Make the best use of this water, And be careful not to make the spring cloudy.

She wears many hats with confidence and grace – be that of an obedient daughter, responsible employee or a caring mentor. We have heard this zillion of times and will continue to. For me, a woman is akin to a butterfly that represents freedom to fulfill her deepest aspirations and dreams. For me she is the most beautiful and tender butterfly who has faced life’s trickier moments boldly and I wish she continues to do the same in future too.
 She is actually an ordinary person with a lot of admirable and trustworthy personality. She has been through a lot in taking care of me since long. Right up to now, she has never given up on me and I am sure, a mentor never does. In my own eyes, I have always seen her as a very special and unique person with a lovely and altruistic soul.☺☺☺☺

My mentor and I are almost like best friends. I nearly share every moment of the day with her like going shopping, hanging out at the cafe or just at home. Even though I have a really good relationship with her, we sometimes have the bitter times too. For example, we argued about things we both don’t agree on or I complain when she doesn’t give me sufficient time. If u remember I have talked about her on Friendship’s Day too. She is the same who taught me LIFE means:

L- Laughter in times of sadness and woes

I – Integrity in one’s own belief

F – Fortitude to be independent and an individual

E – Enjoyment in content in life without Expectations

Different ppl myt have learnt to work from her, to be professional, to educate, etc.. But for me she is  a person who has taught me the meaning of word "LIFE"... I for surely got a goal and an ambition in lyf after her guidance...!! A person who taught me how to accept the negative things that are happening in life.. How to maintain the positive things happening in life...!!  She is a guiding light for me... An angel god has sent in my life who actually has proved to be a Friend, Philosopher, Guide and Maaa....!! ☺☺

She taught me to maintain self-respect.. She taught me to neva take revenge... She taught me to save money.... She taught me to control and suppress emotions at time.. She taught me how to handle my ownself when no1's around when u need... She taught me to lift my ownself up.. ☺☺

U know people have different ambitions.. Some wanna become doctor, engineer, entrepreneur, lawyer, good individual, etc... But I have just 1 ambition, I wanna be like 'HER'... I cannot be 100% HER but even if I be 60% like her I would be more than happy....☺☺

I mean totally like HER... 

The way she carries herself,

The way she dresses herself, 

The way she walks with elegance, 

The way she handles her saari.. 

The way she doesn’t  say anything but her eyes speak it all.. 

The way she cares about every1 so much although without expressing much.. 

The way she is soooo down to earth,,, 

The way she handles herself in pain 

The way she handles her happiness and controls her emotions

The way she becomes strict and yet generous at the same time..

The way she does soooo much for me but still prefers to be like Undercover…

and it goes on...!!

Its really tough to be HER.. but still I strongly aspire to be like HER... I am gonna blindly follow whateva she says without reasoning as i neva need to do that in her case coz I have some kinda blind faith.. And i vl neva let her down....And m always gonna b der for HER.... No matter what...!! I still say she’s kinda Morrie for me from “Tuesdays with Morrie”.. and I wish I had Tuesdays with her.. ☺☺

Here's a small poem that I wrote for her:

"You are a Strong Woman who knows how to keep her life in line..

Although u may be in Pain but Still U manage to Say, I m Fine

You were there for me since the very beginning and saved me countless tears.
The pushy and wise advice you gave will carry me through the years.

With my every mistake or wrongful deed,
you were always there to understand my need.
You put no limits on my dreams or anything else I wish to do.
You never say you care but ur actions actually do.
We have had a rocky road through triumph and catastrophe, hard time and despair,
But not a single moment where I would not like to share..
You have always put in your last with love and my whole life is not enough time for me to repay you.
We always put our disagreements to the side and manage to make it through. 

I know that my many gestures may have driven you crazy but you have guided me with assurance along the way.
You have given me comfort and certainty with every breath I take within the day.
I have my whole future ahead of me and you are the women that has leaded me and guided me towards the proper path.
How can one simple day prove that much thanks and love to someone who has pushed this far and still is working her way?

I want to be with you, But you’re millions of miles away.
I wish you would call just to ask about my day.
It would make things so much better if I could hear your voice,
I guess I can’t complain too much, it just wasn’t your choice.

The path of life shall guide you, And move you swiftly on,

But don’t forget there is some one here to waiting for u on the horizon
There are new things for U to discover, And unseen sights to see,
But always I’ll be waiting, For when you return to me.
The road stretches before you, No one knows just how far,
And whatever may befall you, Just remember who you are,
A Mentor For Some, A Dictator For Few….

But for me U r an Angel and Mumma that God has sent who made me Grew…

I still say Believe in yourself and Neva Underestimate Yourself..

I m the person who wants to be U and forget my Own self..

There may be miles of queue and tons of crowd around U..

But I wish I could just borrow u for a second and have a word with U..

At times, I envy those people who hug U now and then

Coz For that particular moment they are holding my Mummaa and don’t let me spend a nano second with u all over again…

Just remember one thing I am gonna be with U, for U and take care of U forever..

Irrespective of geographical location, M gonna keep in touch with u forever…!!

I am proud of all the things that you have done

I am proud of all the victories you've won

I am proud, I celebrate You

Even if there is nothing else that you would ever do

I celebrate your existence Just for Being You!

I Am Glad you're here, I'll ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOU...!" ☺☺

For Me- She is A Woman Of Substance and Dignity.... Her attitude depicts her Elegant Personality..!! Kudos to Her as a Mentor, As a Person...!!

Needless to say this is how I would like if I be like her:

Dearest Darling Daughters

We the Daughters are - Delightful, Attentive, Understanding Girls, Highly Thoughtful, Ever, Reliable...!!

We Daughters bring Beauty and Life to a home with our Tittle-Tattle. We are Dad’s sweetheart and a Mom’s dream and treasure. We learns less and teach more. 

The first time when a daughter is held by her father in his shaking arms, she brings exuberance and delight. I remember my Dad calling me a "Chatter-box" all the time. And the same dad, when I go for a job may it be even for 6 hours misses my tittle-tattle all the time. A daughter's relation with her dad is the 1st male-female relationship in her life. When dad respects and listens our opinions, we gain self-confidence, self-esteem and pride. Dads, thus, lay the groundwork for the type of relationship that their daughters will share with men later in their life.

I still love the line - "To my husband I may not be the Queen, But to my Dad I am always gonna remain her Princess...!!"

A Mother’s best friend, we add sweetness and spice to her life making her a child too. Daughters usually depend on their mothers to help them form their definition of 'womanhood'. Mothers are role models for their daughters. They exemplify how to be an individual, a mother and a wife. She instills in us 3 C's- Compromise, Commitment and Consideration.

Parents watch their daughter grow, second by second with glee and gladness, excitement and exhilaration, apprehensions and tensions and stand by her through all her phases from childhood to teenage and to motherhood.

No matter how grown up she is and how old she gets, it is her prerogative to be a little sulky girl for her parents and they love her for that too. She teaches them patience and forgiveness, tolerance and selflessness and has the key to their hearts forever.The kind of affection so purely angelic that she brings, she deserves to be made special. 

We- The Daughters are the store houses of love, care and innocence as kids, as teenagers, as wives and even we turn mothers..!! And no matter where we go or we settle, we always have our parent by our side. Specially in Indian Society, Widows get Sympathy, Dead get Respect and Singles get Scorn. But forour parents, they still shower us with all the Love, Care and Respect irrespective of our status. They are protective for Daughters, may she be unmarried, divorcee or widows. 

Dedicated to all the Darling Daughters:

From the day one we become Apple of our Dad's eyes
Our Silent Tears do Wonders and Dad agrees to do on what he said a big 'NO' earlier
We can walk in style all day long without looking Tired
We burn our hand atleast once while learning cooking but We Never Complaint
We can Cry throughout the night, but the next morning when our Eyes are Blood-Shot its just Coz Mascara has hit Eyes
We like to be called "Angel", "Princess" or "Baby"
As kids We are dependent on our Parents, and as Adults we like to take care of our Parents..
No matter where we get married, We still are much careful of our Responsibilities towards our Parents
We Leave Behind Our house, Our Parents, Our Room, and still Adjust easily in a nano second...
We Hold Mother's Hands and Dad's Hearts....!!! 

I strongly believe - God must have smiled when He made Daughters, Because He knew He has created love and happiness, for every Mom & Dad. He also ensured that in days to come they will become mother's, 
And give more Daughters to this World, And the cycle of life and death will continue for generations and years to come.


See what a daughter can do to you:

D.... oes so much to bring you joy..... 
A.... dds lots of love to your world.... 
U... plifts you with her smile...... 
G..... ives you memories to cherish..... 
H... as the warmest hugs to share..... 
T.... ouches your heart with her sweetness.... 
E... njoys doing thoughtful things...... 
R.... adiates her own special beauty......

And just to add the froth to the Irish cuppa coffee, Here's an Irish saying:

"A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life....!! "

Happy Daughters Day to All the Females at Every End of the World...!! ...Respect the Womanhood.. And For today -- Daughterhood...!! 

Be Alone..But Not Lonely..!!

Let us accept the fact that each one of us has ‘n’ number of mood swings and actually that swings to and fro with highest Amplitude and Frequency.  And we all have a phase where we love to detach ourselves from the entire social circle. Just be with ourselves. It may be coz we are hurt or it may be when we need eternal peace. When we wanna find Peace within ourselves.  Or may be Wanna Heal. Coz Life Neva Promised to be Pleasant all the time. This blog is about how Sometimes unwantedly  the Clouds of  Loneliness Creep in and Sting bitterly. But never to forget that its Darkest right before the Dawn and then the Rays of Sun Stream in With Pleasures. But its u who has to find that ray of hope. I too went through this phase.

There was a time when loneliness crept in my life too. Don’t know whether it was willingly or unwillingly. We all have different ways of handling it. But being alone can be a bliss but being lonely is never.

The only Sounds in the house I could hear were the little one’s, the simmer of coffee on a gas, clanking of cups, the bite of knife wedging the vegetables on the chopping board. And I would get lost at times getting my skin peeled out by knife. At times, I felt like starting the mixture though there was nothing inside it just to fill the nook with some sound. Or would cook with loud volume music and headphones on.

When I would step out of the kitchen and onto the hallway, my bare feet even wouldn’t make sound against mirror-finished grey kota stone flooring. In late afternoon, I would look over my bedroom where the pale light from dipping sun streamed in through windows. I would listen music at high volumes on my i-pod or laptop because I loved producing sound from what I imagined to be an empty expanse.

At times I would enter my own room like an intruder. And funnily, scarcely a few hints indicated that I lived there, like my  clothes in my wardrobe, and my books on my shelves, and my pictures on my room walls.  At times after late night slumber, I felt like this, I would pull the sheets of comforter over my face and search something inside me that would compel me to rise and go back to living. And at times would stare at the vacant pillow besides me.

Days after days wrapped up itself in a shell of emptiness and nights arrived with a new set of promises and resolutions that got broken once mornings set in. I craved for something: Might be harmony, Might be understanding, Might be peace, Might be Happiness, Might be Someone to shake me off from my Loneliness, Someone to just hug me…!! At times I would wake up to squeals and laughter of the T.V. shows that had remained on while I went to sleep watching it. Happiness had become jarring.  From the moment I woke up till I fell into fitful sleep, and sometimes in my dreams too, my mind was logged with Questions – What am I doing to myself? Why am I punishing myself ? Is it nice being lonely or Is it nice being Alone? Is it nice getting detached  or its that m scared of attachments or commitments now???

At times the nerves in my body beat up hard against my skin. It was as if my body had turned inside out, leaving me hollowed me out. There was a kind of rage, don’t know about what and against whom, inside me that I wanted to let out. I wondered what could I do to make my burning thoughts and boiling blood turn into simmer. I would fall down against bed on the floor, cry till I could no more and get up to beat the patches made by my tears.  I would neva look into the mirror and even if I would, I would with criticizing look.

I had always chosen my dreams and ambitions as per my will, coz I neva wanted to blame anyone else for my choices or my life. So now finding myself  in unchartered territory, I didn’t know what my next Milestone would be. For me, neither the neglect, nor the joys made the difference. Having seen loss and failure, I lived in perpetual fear of disaster. There was no definition of my days. I would wake up whenever sunlight streamed in through my bedroom windows, at times may be at afternoon. I knew it was nightfall when the dusk stole light from the novels that I was reading. I never remembered what I cooked or ate although I ate 3 meals a day. After the music and novels, I would clock the passage of time by looking at the traffic sitting on my favourite swing. Days continued clocking in and out, blending into each other.

Then one day, as per mom’s wish I stepped outta the house, going to a Mall for shopping. Everywhere there were people, shops and cars. No one strolled non-chalantly, stopping to catch up with friends; infact people were rushing past each other with their ears pressed in their mobiles. The singular factor defining the mall was its sound that rushed towards me like an enemy I could not fight. Having looked at so much of crowd after weeks, I could feel the life throbbing back into my veins. Somehow I gradually started loving it all over again. The fresh air streaming in from car windows blew my awkwardness away....!! ☺☺

Coming back, I directly headed to my room for a long hot shower. I came out an hour later. I guess all I wanted at that time was a long cry in the shower so that I could release the pain that had built up inside me so far..  I almost started sobbing till my breathe got suffocated. Felt at peace. I felt as if my old self had been stripped away and I slipped into a new skin, just like a tree that would shed its dried leaves and welcome the new fresh leaves.  Happiness started inching towards me like a wave, and knowing how fickle it was, I dint wanna scare it away with sudden bouts of despair.

I came back to my routine life. Getting up early, going to gym for 2 hrs, cook, eat, educate the servant class in late afternoon which gives me contentment and evenings sitting on the swing with my music. Night with novels.  I still m alone but not Lonely….!! I enjoy every bit of this life... Living it to the Fullest...!! ☺☺

So please Learn to Be Alone without Being Lonely.  And if u at all feel lonely, just go out, take a deep breathe.. Let the fresh air caress u.  And when u urself cant understand whats going on, trust the instincts and decisions of ur loved ones. Coz u might not see in your darkness what they can see since they are at dawn…!!☺☺

Standing Alone Just means U r Strong Enough To Handle things By Urself..!!

Being Alone is Not Bad… But Being Lonely Is… Be Alone But Not Lonely… Enjoy Being Alone..!!! May it just be a cuppa coffee... Enjoy Every sip of it Alone...And shake off Ur loneliness.. Life is Beautiful.. Notice it.. Fight for Ur Dreams...!! ☺☺☺☺

My BFF- Best Friends Forever..!!

Losing or Parting from our Best friends at any point of time is a matter of inexplicably Unbearable Pain for any of us, right? Yes, but let me ask an important question: Who is your best friend? If you ask the same question to anybody, of course, they suddenly will remember a long list of their sweet and beloved friends and reveal their names with extra details enthusiastically. 

Try to pose one more question: What do you mean by friendship? Oh My God..! They start to tell all the stuff they did with their friends. Surely, we all know the likes and dislikes of our friends and also we respect them. But my Question is, Do we ever think of making friendship with our own Parents or Mentors who guide our lives..???  Who are the candles that enlighten our lives. Do we???? We never do that.

My this blog is dedicated to few important people in my life whose words urged me and wanted me to write something…

Lets come to the people for whom I may have forgotten to say that they are my Best Friends.. or against whom I may have rebelled at times that they are not my friends..!! They are My Parents n My Mentor….!! My parents who brought me to LIFE and my Mentor who taught me the meaning of the word – LIFE…!! ☺☺

Growing up, my Mom and Dad always told me that they were my Best Friends and no matter what they would always be there for me. At such a young age, I went through many stages in my life were I disagreed with what they told me. I would go through times where I said I hated them so much for punishing me, enforcing rules, and keeping me from doing the things that I wanted.  In school, I excelled in all the courses with very high grades. I thought because of my outstanding grades, I could defy my parents’ rules and guidelines all that I wanted. At the time, they were the last people I would consider my "Friends".

However, as I grew up, I have come to realize one thing I never did before; My parents are my Best Friends. With their love and guidance, my parents have had a tremendous impact on the person I am today. They have coached me rather than making decisions for me. I always have been given the freedom to discuss openly and frankly on anything…(however m still hesitant to an extent) !! When I had my first crush, my parents knew it before my crush knew it..!! Lol… They have been with me.. Stood by me.. Always showed me the fairer side of life and enriched my life with their compassion.. And I think that’s what a  Best Friend is meant to do.. ☺☺

Well..Unfortunately the same is the case with My Mentor. My first impression for my Mentor was she is a “Serious Dictator” who just orders me- “How to act?” and “What to do?” (LOL) ..bcoz she happened to be my boss too. But within quite a short time I realized it wasn’t true at all.. Infact she was never my boss... Infact, she is Gem of a Person as I always say.  Never realized that whom I never understood in the beginning and who never understood me in the start would one day be a person to whom I would rush when I have any single thing to share.. May it be happy or may it be sad... It is from her I learnt the meaning of word -  LIFE. She taught me LIFE is simple:

L- Laughter in times of sadness and woes

I – Integrity in one’s own belief

F – Fortitude to be independent and an individual

E – Enjoyment in content in life without Expectations

Quite Easy na?? But it took me 6 months to understand what she was trying to explain. She’s one more person who is responsible for what I am and who I can count like 1,2,3 in my best friends’ list along with my parents. Infact I would have got lost in the Fog of Depression if she wasn’t the street light who enlightened and showed me the way. And today is the time when if I sneeze I would let her know. Infact for her, I genuinely believe that "When Destiny Forgets to Tie Sm People in Blood Relations, It corrects its mistake by making Them Best Friends..!" She's that close to me. My Mentor- My BFF (Best Friend Forever) for sure..!! ☺☺☺

These are the people we forget in our daily lives. Friends we should realize that nobody can be a better friend than our parents or mentors, who may already have lost many of their ‘close friends’ in course of upbringing their children or upbringing an institute in case of a mentor. If we shun close bond with our parents or mentor, loneliness will become a part of their life. Surely they will accept it as fate. 

How many of us know what is up with our parents, the same way that we know what is going on with our friends are up to? How many of us has that one person in life other than parents who taught us how to live? And when we start enjoying our life how many of us go back and tell that Mentor thanks for teaching us the same? A piece of paper – a resignation – an air ticket – all these should not make us forget what they did for us. Are we aware How they are feeling? What makes them happy, angry, annoyed or frustrated? Unfortunately, we do not know our parents or mentors as much as we know our friends. Did we ever ask them what their friends were like? What was their perspective about friendship when they were kids or our age?

When we give preference for our ‘personal life’ over relationship with our parents and mentors we should realize that they too had a personal life before our birth or when heard our catharsis for hours in case of mentor. But did they care about their personal life at that time? Infact they made us their priority.. Then how can we treat them as an option..??? Are we that cruel???

We should talk to our parents and mentors more often; we should hang out with them once in a while, take them out for a coffee or lunch or dinner and get to know them. We will find that this will not only give us a new perspective on their parenting or mentorship, but it will instill a new found mutual respect in us for them and in them for us, and it will also create and strengthen a connection that should last a life time - that of friendship.☺☺☺

Since last 10 years I have been celebrating Friendship’s day and Valentine’s Day with my Parents. However this year, this year I would like to spend some time with my mentor too ( incase she's free from her busy schedule) and know her perspective on friendship. Because for me she is Morrie and I always say I wish I had Tuesdays or Sundays or Any days with her...(P.S. -Those who dint understand.. Read the book -"Tuesdays with Morrie".. and u will get to know what does the word MENTOR mean) ... I want to know their experiences and want their teachings to consume me soooo much that this can be the most memorable friendship’s day of my life…!! ☺☺☺

Happy Friendship's Day to all of U with a Cuppa Coffee...!!☺

Live to the Fullest, Jst Dont Exist...!!

Oscar Wilde said - "To Live is the Rarest thing in the World, Most people Exist, That is All...!!" ☺☺
Now a days people eke out a living, improve their living conditions or keep their high standard of living,  but They Forget to Live...! Infact, People don't Live, but They Survive Each day, for they are too Busy, too Tired, too Stressed and too Worried to really enjoy the pleasures of life. ☺


Here are the 15 ways To Live and Not Just Exist...:-


1. Appreciate the People & Things in Your Life: 
Appreciate the People in Ur Life Now. You have No Way of Knowing How Long They'll be there. Show Ur Love Now before Someone has been taken away Tomorrow. Cherish those who Love U and Appreciate them today. Appreciate Small Things n Gestures in Life.. It may be a Hug.. It may be a Helping Hand.. It may be a Good Morning Wish.. It may be a Smile...These are small things that can give Big Joys...!! ☺☺


2. Ignore other People's Negativity:
Never debate with Negative People. Be Empathetic. Help them to Address their Emotions, the Solutions will automatically will come to them. Converse only on light topics like New movies, Daily occurrences, Common friends, Jokes, etc. that can lighten their mood. Praise the person for Positive things. If possible, reduce the contact gradually. 


3. Forgive those who Hurt U:
Forgiveness is the attribute of Strong People. Weak can just take revenge. Always Remember Forgiveness Warms the Heart and Cools the Sting thereby Maintains the Thermal Equilibrium of our Emotions. Forgive those who Hurt U but Never Forget what it Taught U...!!


4. Never Lose Ur Individuality:
Never Lose Ur Individuality or Identity. Once u Lose that, U just become one more face in the Crowd. Those who Love u will never ask u to give up Ur individuality. They will Love U for what u are, what u were and what U are yet to be.. Those who Mind Ur Individuality Don't Matter and those who Matter just Don't Mind..!!


5. Listen to Ur Inner Voice:
Listen to Ur Inner Voice. Trust Ur Instincts n Intuitions. Don't blindfoldly trust what others say. Take some time out before U go to bed and talk with yourself. Jot down Ur thoughts. Go through it once in a while. U will get all the answers by yourself. Believe in Urself. ☺☺


6. Embrace Change and Enjoy Ur Life as it Unfolds:
Don't be Resistant to Changes. Infact embrace it with Open Arms. Let the Life Unfold itself. U never know Life has its own Surprises. Some may be Pleasant, and Few may be Unpleasant. But then every cloud has a silver lining. Think Positive about the changes. Don't stagnate urself. Keep moving. Always remember that it is Darkest just right before the Dawn...!! 


7. Choose Ur Relationships Wisely:
A man is known by the company he keeps. So choose ur relationships wisely. Be only with those who give u reasons to Smile and not those who try to Bring u Down. Relationships play the most important role in helping you Live the Life. Be with People who know Ur Worth. U don't need the whole team to be Happy coz of U.. U just need a handful of them who appreciate for who U are..  ☺☺☺


8. Recognize those who Love U:
Its so said that - "Its Not ur fault if U cant judge the Eyes that Ditch You.. But its Definitely Ur Fault if U can't judge the Eyes that Love U." Those who love you will never leave u for ur Mistakes, when u r Broken or when u Lie or when u r Ugly. Infact they are the ones who Accept ur Mistakes, Give U Moral Support when u r Broken, Accept ur Excuses and who knows ur Inner Beauty. They are the ones who will show U why life  is Beautiful and y is it mandatory to Live it..!! Those who love u will love u unconditionally.. without  any expectations in return...!! Identify them and Cherish them....!! ☺☺☺

9. Love Urself:
If U want to actually Live n Not just Exist.. This is the main key.. Love Urself... Hug Urself every morning when u wake up.. and say - "I Love myself for Being me"...!! Always remember... Only if U Love Urself, only then  U can expect Someone Else to Love U...!! ☺


10. Do things Ur Future Self will Thank U For:
Do something Now that will make U Proud of Ur Ownself in Ur Later years. Do something that gives u contentment permanently. Touch a life. Enlighten a Soul. Enrich with your Love n Care. ☺


11. Be Thankful for all the Troubles U Don't  Have:
I have seen many of us cribbing for very small things. Like My mom didnt cook my favourite dish well.. My mentor didn't answer my call back. My dad dint lend me the car today to drive. At the same times, what about those who don't have food to eat. Those who have celebrities as their role models and cant meet them for lifetime. Because this one is accessible it doesnt mean they have to reciprocate every single thing. What about those who walk on foot daily to save their expenses. Be grateful for whatever u have got. God knows and gifts U whateva u Deserve and Not what u Desire. And the only Key to it is Don't Expect... Let every little thing be surprise and see how it makes u Happy.  Be unconditional. ☺


12. Leave Enough Time for Fun:
Do things that make u happy and in which u experience fun. Like I love to care and love n surprise my nearest n dearest ones... I love music.. I love being on Swing.... I love talks over Coffee... Anything...!! Do what gives u pleasure and u will actually enjoy living ur life every moment... ☺


13. Enjoy the Little Things in Life:
Enjoy and Appreciate Little things in Life.. We wish to earn loads of money but we have the best of times only when we just discover just 10 bucks in pocket surprisingly... We wish to wear high brands but we feel most comfortable in track pants and night suits...We wish to Sit in Taj and Marriot with elite people but the fun is in having Pani-Puri at a roadside Lorry with closest friends...Sometimes A Small walk to Remember with Dear ones is much better than Long Drives.... Sometimes sitting with someone and having no conversation is much better than having 2 hours long talk.... Take note of small gestures n small things so when u achieve bigger ones, u can smile n say - "I have lived it all"....!!!


14. Accept the fact that Past is Not Today:
Past is a Nice Place to Visit .. But Definitely Not a Good Place to Stay or Reside... Accept that whats gone is gone... And for thing that is gone, U cant ruin the current Moment... which is called "Present" - A gift...Just learn to live at the moment and that too to the fullest...!!  ☺☺


15. Let Go when U must: 
Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure. The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that that situation is over, you cannot move forward....!!!


So lets just not Exist for the sake of the Existence... Lets b Fit and Live to the Fullest..... Coz at the end its the Survival of the Fittest.... and that Can only be Possible if U Live ur Life to the Fullest....!!! ☺☺☺


Stop Trying to Fit in... When u were already Born to Stand Out...!! ☺☺☺